As the suppliers of the best wedding bands Scotland has to offer, we know weddings, having been to a fair few. A wedding is without a doubt one of the most special days of your life and to underline the importance of this occasion, wedding ceremonies aren’t complete without symbols of unity and loyalty that serve to demonstrate your love for one another and the strength of your union.
Symbols of unity and loyalty are steeped in tradition and history and after the big day, they can become keepsakes that remind married couples of their vows. But does anyone actually know what they mean? No? You’re not alone. So we thought we’d pull together a guide of the top ten most traditional wedding symbols, which you’ll see at almost every wedding you attend, the meaning behind them as well as a few alternatives if the old ways aren’t your way.
The First Dance
The Tradition:
Well, given the fact that we are a wedding band agency, of course we’ll start with this one. A tradition that goes all the way back to the sixteenth century, this is a classic symbol of unity at a wedding. In the past, guests would start the dance and the couple would join in for their first dance together as a married couple before moving on to waltz with their guests. Nowadays, the first dance is treated more like a performance, with all eyes on the bride and groom.
The Alternative:
It is safe to say that a large number of couples dread this part of the wedding. Not everyone likes to (or can) dance and even fewer people like to be the centre of attention. As the wedding day is filled with stomach churning moments like walking down the aisle, the vows, the speech, the cake cutting, the first dance might be a step too far for some. If it’s something you feel you have to endure rather than enjoy - don’t do it! It’s YOUR wedding, do it your way. More of a karaoke duo than a pas de deux couple? Go for it, sing your first song together and forget about the dancing. Or, if you’re far more comfortable dancing with other people, organise a flash mob with your nearest and dearest. Want something a bit more low profile? Use the first dance slot to take the opportunity to spend your first few moments alone together as a married couple. Trust us, opportunities to do this at a wedding are few and far between, so grab your champagne, go for a walk around your venue, enjoy each others’ company and let the fact that you’re married sink in.
The White Wedding Dress
The Traditional:
As with most traditional elements of the big day the white dress is closely linked with religion. Historically, the bride dressed in white as a promise of her purity and righteousness before the eyes of God. By wearing white, the bride also set herself apart from the rest of the entourage as the bright hue made her stand out from the guests at the wedding (which is also why wearing white is a big no, no!)
The Alternative:
For women who don’t particularly like the traditional white dress - or dresses at all in fact - the apparent pressure on brides to wear white can put them off having a wedding, or getting married altogether. But who says white is right? Times have moved on and a white dress is no longer considered the only route a bride can go down. We’ve seen brides in electric blue, stunning red and bright yellow gowns which made them look simply stunning and set them apart from their guests more effectively than a white equivalent. And who says it needs to be a dress? A tailored suit with killer heels, is equally stylish and glamorous.
The Wedding Band
The Tradition:
A wedding band was used as a symbol of the love between the happy couple. The bride and groom wear a ring to signify their vow to each other—for better or worse, in sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer, until death etc etc. The ring, being a circle, also represents eternal love and loyalty. Exchanging rings also symbolises that the bride and groom are giving each other all their resources.
The alternative:
Jewellery isn’t for everyone and what if wearing items of jewellery just isn’t practical or possible at your place of work? Fear not, there are alternatives! If you want a symbol of unity to keep on your person at all times, tattoos are a popular option. And no, we’re not necessarily talking about a full tattoo sleeve - it doesn’t even have to be visible to anyone other than your partner (for example an elegant design next to your heart is quite a romantic gesture). Scared of needles? No problem. Another great way to symbolise your union is wine. Couples choose a bottle of wine - usually a vintage from the year they were married - and buy a crate of it. Every year on their anniversary, they crack open a bottle of their wedding wine and toast another successful year of marriage. As the wine ages, so does the marriage mature. Pretty romantic! Other options include paintings, framed vows, stars named after the couple - the list is endless.
Bridal Veil
The Tradition
The veil is another symbol of purity and modesty. The bride wears the veil in the early part of the wedding ceremony and as the ceremony nears its end, the husband lifts the veil and kisses the bride. This symbolises the lifting of the barrier between the couple so that they can live together in a prosperous and happy marriage.
The Alternative:
Modesty is overrated - you look absolutely gorgeous, probably the best you’ve ever looked, so why cover your face? Here you can let your imagination run wild. You can have a tiara, a flower crown, a floral bouquet, a Game of Thrones-style diadem or even a hat to rival the concoctions at Ascot. Or you can have nothing at all - after spending all that time styling your hair into something stunning, why put something over it at all? Style it out and make it your own.
Throwing of the Rice
The Tradition:
This tradition - one that makes a mess and apparently bloats pigeons - actually started out as seeds thrown at the newlyweds instead of rice. The throwing of seeds was a reminder to the couple of their promise to go forth and multiply. Later, wedding guests threw rice at the couple to wish them good fortune and bountiful blessings.
The Alternative:
You definitely want to go more eco friendly here, especially with all of the alternatives around. Consider blowing bubbles, throwing flower petals or dried flowers or be a friend to nature and throw bird seed or wild-flower seeds. Other, very photogenic options include sparklers, feathers, paper airplanes or even eco friendly glitter that melts away thereby avoiding the horrific mess it could otherwise leave behind. Always consider whether your chosen method is eco-friendly!
Lighting of the Unity Candle
The Tradition:
The lighting of the unity candle by the couple symbolises the end of their singlehood as they move on to married life. It can also mean an eternal promise to love each other as husband and wife.
The Alternative:
If you fancy doing something a bit different then you can really have some fun with this one. Some couples like the sand ceremony where they combine two colours of sand in a beautiful container to symbolise their lives becoming intertwined. If you’ve ever tried to separate sand, you’ll know this is extremely difficult so it acts as the perfect symbol of unity. Planting a tree together is another beautiful way to symbolise your union. As the tree grows so will the strength of your marriage and every year on your anniversary you’ll have the pleasure of seeing just how far it - and you- have come. Added advantage here of leaving a positive mark on the world as one of your first acts as a married couple.
Wedding Coins or Wedding Arrhae
The Tradition:
The word arrhae comes from the Spanish word “arras”, meaning earnest money. Historically the groom gave the arrhae to the bride to symbolise that he will take care of his family, not only financially but emotionally and spiritually as well.
The Alternative:
This one’s a bit controversial in todays’ society which is trying hard to achieve equality. Fortunately, there are other ways you can promise to look after each other - both materially and emotionally. Opening a joint savings or investment account and putting in a sum before your wedding day is very sensible and has the added bonus of showing your commitment to each other. Writing down marriage promises, signing them and exchanging them on the day of your wedding is a very romantic way to symbolise how you have committed to looking after one another on a more spiritual level. Using your wedding anniversary to take stock of both your financial and spiritual investments is a good way to see if there’s anything you would like to do better going forward in your marriage.
Bride’s Garter
The Tradition:
It is believed that a piece of the bride’s clothing brings good luck. So the groom takes off the bride’s garter and throws it to the male guests. Whoever catches the garter is believed to be the lucky gentleman to tie the knot next.
The Alternative:
Not keen to throw away a bit of your underwear into a group of your partners’ mates? Don’t blame you. There’s absolutely no shame in abandoning this tradition altogether, it’s just a bit awkward all around. Making the assumption that all the lads want to get married and putting the spotlight on everyone who’s single is probably not great. Turning up the heat in the relationship of the poor guy who catches it might lead to an awkward conversation between the couple anyway. Some traditions really don’t stand the test of time and it’s perfectly ok to get rid of them if they’re not right for you.
Wedding Cake
The Tradition:
The cake symbolises the sweet life that awaits the newlywed couple. The act of cutting the cake, with the groom helping the bride, represents the first task the newlyweds have done together as a married couple. They each have to feed each other to symbolise their commitment to love and support each other forever.
The Alternative:
Some people are just not fans of dessert and there’s nothing wrong with that whatsoever. How about a pie cake instead, where you can alternate each layer with different types of pie? Or a sushi cake with different layers of sushi rolls? Or even a pizza cake, when you can layer your favourite pizzas to form a multi-tiered creation. The options are endless so pick what you consider to be your favourite treat and stack it up to create a masterpiece to rival any traditional wedding cake.
Bouquet
The Tradition:
Some squeamish readers may want to skip this section because in the olden times, the bride carried a bouquet of flowers to mask foul body odor - people didn’t bathe much in those days. But thankfully, now the bride’s hygiene isn’t a cause for concern anymore. Even though brides don’t need to hide their odor, the tradition of carrying bouquets continues. During the reception, the bride throws her bouquet to a swarm of lady guests. It is believed that whoever catches the bouquet is the next to get married.
The Alternative:
Much like with the garter, the throwing of the bouquet might not be for you and if you suffer from hayfever or just aren’t a fan of flowers in general you might want to skip it altogether. That being said it’s a good idea to hold something- just so that your hands have somewhere to be, apart from by your side, as you walk down the aisle. Fabric and origami bouquets, as well as bejewelled creations have become increasingly popular. Flowers created from pages of your favourite books or music scores are another romantic alternative and one that you can keep forever. Or, for a glam, Las Vegas look, arrangements of feathers look simply stunning and come out incredibly well in photographs. The options are endless so reinvent tradition and create something stunning that will reflect your wedding theme and personality.
So think about those wedding symbols before the big day and weave them into your wedding in a way that suits you. Each of them plays an important role in making your wedding more meaningful and memorable but you don’t have to stick to the old ways of doing things. Do it your way and make your big day a reflection of you as a couple. And if you need the best wedding bands Scotland has to offer, to add that wow factor to your celebration, you know where to come!